Clutter can cause a lot of anxiety in households; many of us get into debt simply by filling our homes with stuff that doesn’t make us happy. We tend to cling to all this “stuff” and eventually end up passing it down to our kids (or grandkids, or some distant relative).
Why do we do this?
The Psychology of Clutter
We instinctively like to accumulate “stuff.” The world can be a big, scary place, and material goods comfort us...or so we think.
Many years ago, hoarding was useful; it helped people survive through harsh winters, famine and tough times. Our natural instinct was to hold onto stuff just in case. But back then, most people were simply too poor to accumulate an overabundance of stuff. Fast forward 200-plus years, nowadays our natural tendency to cling to stuff has created a scenario where many of us have too much clutter in our lives.
The Clutter Epidemic
Today it’s easier than ever to accumulate stuff. Even lower income earners can overindulge, and it has become a big problem. Companies like Amazon have built empires by facilitating rapid accumulation of goods at lower and lower prices for all to indulge.
Advertising has us chasing stuff we don’t need; everyday we are bombarded with stuff at cheaper prices: clothes, toys, gadgets, furniture, entertainment. It’s more than we could ever have space for, and more than we could ever have time to enjoy.
But it’s so hard for us to resist because we like stuff and once that stuff enters our homes, it is even harder to let go of. This is why millions of families now struggle with clutter, which causes conflict, debt, stress and anxiety.
Steps to Fight Clutter
Decluttering is a family affair and it all starts with one big question: Will anyone be happier if I save this?
The magical power of this question forces us to start talking honestly with the people we love about the things that are truly important. Wading through rooms and boxes and garages and basements and attics full of clutter is hard, but it is easy to put into practice with a few simple steps.
- Get the family talking about the things that bring them happiness.
- Recognize it’s odd to hold onto stuff that doesn’t make you happy.
- Try to commit to living with only those things that truly bring you joy.
- Gift things you own to people who will enjoy them more than you.
- Don’t make assumptions about what people will enjoy - ask them.
- Make a party of it: invite people to see what you’re ready to pass on and encourage them to take anything they’d love with no obligations.
The Gifting Mindset
The thoughtful gifting away of belongings brings deep joy, and we shouldn’t wait too long to do it. As we move through milestones in our lives, we should pass on things that will make other people happier now. This is a brilliant habit to get kids into - it helped my seven-year old let go of toys that will make someone else happier.
Once you start looking at your stuff in that way, it’s amazing how much it frees us to let things go: all those craft supplies or books we’ll never read again, the kitchen gadget still in it’s sealed box - someone else could truly enjoy them. If you can’t find anyone to gift your things to, try to sell them and make a donation to your favourite charity with the proceeds you generate.
Once you get into the gifting mindset, it becomes much easier to give away the stuff you don’t need, which in turn fights our hoarding instincts.
The gifting mindset can be super helpful for people who totally resist decluttering; it may just be the breakthrough the hoarders in your family need. This is especially true if you’re drowning in your kids’ clutter as well as your own.
Rather trying to force yourself to declutter, try create gifting opportunities. The huge power in this is that it forces us look at our clutter differently.
Practical Decluttering Tips
Here are some handy tips on downsizing your way to freedom while avoiding dumping clutter on your kids.
- Avoid emotional clutter at the start but recognize different members of the family will be emotional about different things.
- Try to keep just one special box of mementos you can truly enjoy revisiting.
- Try to stop treating yourself with “things,” and learn to enjoy stuff without having to owning them.
- Make a “death kit” with hard copies of passwords and essential financial details. It may sound morbid, but it will make life so much easier if something happens to you.
- Focus on what makes us happy and stop worrying about the rest. JUST LET IT GO!
I really hope this helps get you and your whole family in the decluttering and gifting mindset. GOOD LUCK!
Thanks for taking time to read The Home Blog.
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